Why You Fail When You Make New Year's Resolutions

Have you ever made New Year's Resolutions and failed to meet them? It seems like by the middle of February, you are no longer doing what you set out to do on January 1. Why do you think that is? Here are my ideas on why we are often unsuccessful when it comes to resolutions.

You Set Unclear Goals

A lot of times, we will make unclear goals. For example, a lot of people say they want to lose weight. That sounds like a great goal, but it isn't a defined goal. How much weight do you want to lose? What time frame would you like to lose it in? What will you do to lose the weight? 

Without clear expectations, you will burn out fast. You need clear goals that are broken down. 

You Make Resolutions For the Wrong Reason

We make resolutions because we believe we have to. That is the wrong reason to decide to do something. If you are doing it just because you think you have to, you probably won't be successful. When you have the right motivation, you will meet your goals. 

You feel the pressure to make goals because the rest of the world is. It is better to make a resolution to do something when you feel passionate about it. Don't wait until the New Year, get started now. 

You Try To Improve Too Many Things at Once

It seems logical to tackle every area of your life that needs improving while you have some motivation, right? Really, you are just setting yourself up for failure. When you make too many resolutions, you will burn out quickly. 

If you want to make more than one resolution, start with one thing on the list. Master that first, then move to the next thing. 

You Want an Immediate Payoff

We are conditioned to want results immediately. That is what marketing tells us. Get results fast. To have long term results, you must be committed to working hard for a long time. We have high expectations that with a small amount of work, we should see amazing results. 

Ok, so you ate health for two days, and it was hard. Should you see the scales go down one pound? No. You won't see any results from a weight loss program for a few weeks. It will happen so gradually, that you might not notice it without someone point it out. 

The best way to be successful with your goals is to set reasonable goals that you can keep. Be sure you make them with the right motivation. Then be patient as you work toward your goals. 

You can read my other article about Top New Year's Resolutions 2015 and how you can actually keep them. 

Christmas Quotes and Well Wishes

Since Christmas is only a few days away, I wanted to leave you with a few quotes that will warm your heart. This is the time of year that we can show love to one another with passion and grace.

Experience Love This Christmas

I hope you receive enough love to be full all the year through.

Christmas is Love in Action

God sent His Son, Jesus, to the world. That was an expression of love. 

Maybe Christmas Doesn't Come in a Store

Even the Grinch understood that there was more to Christmas than presents. What a valuable lesson we should all learn. 

It is More Blessed to Give Than to Receive

It is so true, it is a greater blessing to give than to receive. When you only think about what you will get for Christmas, you are usually disappointed. I hope you find the real joy of giving this year. 

Merry Christmas From Me to You

I hope you have an amazing Christmas with your friends and family. Enjoy your holiday and spread the cheer!

Video tutorial: how to foil highlight your hair

Do you like the look of highlights, but it cost too much money to go to a salon? If so, watch my video tutorial where I teach you how to do your own highlights using foil. Foiling your hair takes practice, but it is something you can do for yourself.



This will save you a lot of money to highlight your hair at home.









You can visit me at my other website Love Hope Adventure for more DIY projects and methods.

What I Tell My Children About Santa

There are plenty of Christmas wars going on about whether or not to promote Santa and Elf on the Shelf or not. Some people say that it is wrong to tell your kids that there is a man in a big red suit that brings them gifts. That this is really a form of lying that will scar their children.

Others say that it is part of Christmas to put an Elf on the Shelf out every day or promote Santa. If you don't, then you are doing a disservice to your children.

The Reason Santa Doesn't Stop Here

I have a pretty anti-climactic reason as to why I do not teach my children there is a Santa Clause. You can read the full post HERE. Instead of using my creativity to come up with fun ideas for Elf on the Shelf or fantastic Santa stories, I focus my attention on making homemade gifts. 

What I Tell My Children About Santa

Earlier today, I was asked what I tell my children about Santa, especially since a lot of their friends believe in him. This was a bigger issue when my kids were younger, and didn't quite understand why everyone kept asking them what Santa was going to bring them. 

I told my kids that some parents tell their children that Clause is real, as a way to play a game with them. I would explain that he was a fun character that we could think about and watch on television. I also shared that St. Nick was a real man that actually went around and put a gift in children's shoes. 

He is a fun and benevolent character. He isn't banned in our house. We just don't put on a big charade to make our kids thing he brings them presents. We take the credit for the few toys they get each year. 

What I Tell Parents When They Get Mad That My Children Don't Believe in Santa

I wish I could tell you how many times I have had adults look at my kids with a scowl when they say they don't believe in santa. Immediately, adults would instruct my children not to tell the other kids around them or it would spoil Christmas for their friends. 

Of course, the adults would continue on and tell me I needed to make sure that my kids weren't going around telling all of their friends that old St. Nick wasn't real. How dare I not play along with the unwritten rule of not spilling the beans about St. Nick. 

My response to that was: if my children can cause doubt in their child by just saying that santa wasn't real, then they weren't doing a good enough job convincing them he was. 

Really, I can't keep my children from telling others what they believe in. I'm not going to stop my kids from speaking their minds. 

I'm not against Santa or Elf on the Shelf. If you'll read the blog post I linked to, then you'll see that my reason for not bothering with it has nothing to do with a religious or moral position. I love Christmas and seeing other celebrate in the ways that make them feel excited. 

Breasts and the Bible

Did you know that the Bible talks about a woman's breasts? It might surprise you to know that God is the author of sex. He is the one that gave this unique gift to us. 

A Woman's Breasts Are Satisfying to Her Husband

It should be no wonder to us then, that God encourages men to feel satisfied by their wife's breasts. Check out the scripture verse below:

Let me tell you what this verse is not saying. It is not saying that men should have their way with their wives anytime they want. It is not saying that a woman is a sex slave to her husband. 

What Does it Mean

If you look at the entire chapter of Proverbs 5, it is telling men to be faithful. In fact, the verse right before Prov. 5:19 says that a man should take pleasure in the woman he married when he was young. 

That says to me, that when we as women become older, men are instructed by God, to continually satisfy themselves with us. 

Misconceptions About Sex and The Bible

I don't know what your views are about the Bible and sex. I think some people have a misconception that this is a dirty topic in the church or among Christians.

I'm not going to make a stereotype here and say that intercourse isn't an uncomfortable topic for Christians and non-Christians. If you are a parent of a pre-teen, you know exactly what I'm talking about. I don't care what your religious belief system is. Sex is not easy to talk about.

What God Really Thinks About Intercourse

However, the Bible addresses intimacy and intercourse a lot. It talks about the marriage bed and keeping it just between the man and woman. God doesn't want your husband to cheat or a wife to seduce another man.

Now don't misunderstand me. Versus in the scripture do not just give you a list of don't's when it comes to sexual relations. It encourages a man and woman to drink each other up. Fully engage with one another in pleasurable intercourse.

If you are in a sexless marriage or lacking in intimacy, you can go here and read a post I wrote. I talk about re-evaluating your relationship. Won't you join me on this search for closeness in your romantic relationship?

3 Tips for Public Speaking

Each week, I'm given an opportunity to teach a class of some form, whether it is Bible study, preschool classes, or after school care programs. Public speaking is something I have had to do quite a lot of. Over the years, I believe I have gotten better at my delivery. If you are in a place where you are being asked to lead a Bible study or teach a class, here are few things you can do to help out with your public speaking. 

1. Make Notes

I still make notes that are easy to read when I am leading a Bible study or teaching a class. Instead of writing every word of the speech I need to give, I just create a simple outline of things I know I want to talk about. As you speak more often, the notes may become shorter. It is still very important to create a guideline, or you will kick yourself later on for not touching on things that you wanted to talk about. When you write your notes, try to use different colored pens or highlighters to make certain points stand out. The goal is to have notes you can quickly glance down at. 

2. Record Yourself

For a more formal speech or speaking engagement, it might be a good idea to record yourself giving the speech. If you are asked to give your testimony or lead a large group of women, this may be the perfect way to make sure you don't become nervous. When you record yourself, you will be more likely to ignore mistakes and keep going with your speech. Also, when you are done, you have the ability to review what you said. It is important to listen to yourself. 

3. Look Above Their Heads

Public speaking can make many people feel nervous. The best thing to do to keep from being nervous while speaking is to pick a place on the wall, floor, or empty chair to look at. Try not to make eye contact if you are speaking to a large group. In a smaller group, eye contact usually won't make you feel as nervous. You certainly want to make sure that you look engaged with the audience, so picking a place that you can stare that is in the line of site as your crowd will go a long ways in boosting crowd participation. It is best that you avoid staring down at your notes the entire time you are speaking. That is a sure fire way to loose everyone's attention. 

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These are just a few things you can do to prepare for a public speaking occasion whether it is a large venue or a small Bible study. 

Feel free to visit me at Love Hope Adventure, where I talk about the marriage relationship and other relationships in the home. 

I created these pictures at LifeTricks. 

What is Intimacy in Marriage

Probably one of the first things you think about when you hear of intimacy in marriage is sex. Really, intimacy is so much more than just physical acts. It encompasses your mind, body and spirit. Intimacy reaches into the depths of who you are and connects you deeply with someone else.

Natural Intimacy 

When you are newly in love, all you want to do is spend time getting to know that person who holds your attention. Intimacy naturally happens in these romantic relationships. You find that you connect with that person on many levels. It really doesn't seem to matter what you are doing together, you relish the time and attention. After the newness wears off, whether it is after a few years in a dating relationship, or when the honeymoon period is over, deep connection becomes something you have to work toward. That is not to say that there won't be times during your relationship that you feel more connected than others. However, I'm talking about those times when you are going through a bit of a dry spell. How do you re-connect or stay connected when you drift a part? 

Building Deep Connections in Marriage

For the health of long term relationships, deep connections must be made. This goes for your relationships with family, friends, but in particular, your significant other. True intimacy looks different in all of these relationships. In your marriage or romantic relationship, building deep connections takes planning and intention. Here are a few things you can do to feel more connected with the one you love. 

1. Listen- this seems so basic, however, it is a skill many of us lack. How many times are you in a conversation with your loved one and your mind begins to wander. It might not be an intentional thing, you just realize you didn't hear a thing your spouse was saying. When you find yourself in that place, it is important to stop and say to your loved one that they need to repeat themselves. That may be a bit of a frustration for them, but it is very important that hear them. 

2. Serve- when you do something for others around you, you instantly feel connected to them. I think it is because for a moment, you have to put yourself in their place and think about how they will receive your service. Serving doesn't have to be anything big; on the contrary, it is the little things that add up. Take your loved one a drink while they are working out in the yard or fix their favorite meal for dinner. Any small thing will help you to feel connected to them. 

3. Show Affection- being affectionate with your loved one is very important. This can range from kisses on the cheek, to giving a small gift, to full on physical engagement. Showing your partner how much you love them off and on during the day or when you are together, brings you closer together. 

These are just a few of the things you can do to build true intimacy in your relationship with your significant other. 

Visit me at Love Hope Adventure where I talk more about the marriage relationships, along with other relationships in your life. 

6 of My Top Love Quotes

I have seen many great quotes circulating around the internet. So, I decided to make a few of my own that I could share with others. Loving my husband is so important to me, and I try to be reminded of these sayings as much as I can. Many of them are nuggets of wisdom that my mom gave me before I got married. These are not just feel good quotes, but hard to live by.

1. Difficult Times Help Love to Shine

In the hard days is when you see what your love for your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend is really all about. If you can't stay together when times are tough, you won't stay together in the long haul. 

2. Love is Not a Score Keeper

3. What True Love Is

True love is not just mushy stuff, but it is hard work. You have to put the other person's needs above your own. When you put your significant other's needs above your own and they do the same for you, then neither feel deprived. 

4. Love is a Decision 

You are certainly going to feel an initial attraction to someone, but it takes a conscious effort every day to continue to love them. 

5. I Picked Just One

I do care for a lot of people, but my husband is the one I chose. He is the one I plan to be with forever. 

6. Take Care of Others

Just be reminded that love is something you should show yourself, and not just others. 

These are just a few of my favorite love sayings. 

The Jitters of the First Day of School

I don't know about your area, but in my town, today was the first day of school. This is the first year that I have chosen to send my children to public school. It has made for a lot changes in our lives. In the past years, we have homeschooled our children and let them be a part of a co-op for a few of their subjects. My husband, Austin, and I are in a different place in life right now. For that reason, I decided to send my older boys to public school. This year, I plan to focus teaching my pre-schooler at home and continue to grow my business.

These are my sweet boys having their first day of school picture taken.

Check out my full post HERE about the first day of school and all the jitters that we have experienced leading up to the day.

What Are We Teaching Our Children About Social Media and Texting?

Having three children, it really worries me how to introduce the idea of texting and social media to them. I see so many teenagers that are making poor decisions with their social media posts and texting. As parents, what is our role in teaching our children about social media. Is there an etiquette? If we don't teach them, who will.



Check out my post below about three simple things I do to model good behavior and be responsible with my technology.



3 Ways to Model Good Social Media Behavior

How to Make a No-Sew T-shirt Scarf

If you are looking for a simple scarf that you can make on your own without sewing or crocheting, then a DIY t-shirt scarf is right for you. I have made several of these scarves myself.

Above is a picture of me wearing one of these scarves just the other day. I think these are great for fall, winter and spring. You could probably make a really lightweight one for the summer, if you like to wear scarves in the summer.



Check out my tutorial video to see how simple it is to create a scarf like this.





Visit me at Love Hope Adventure for more Diy Craft projects.

How to Make a Galaxy Design on White Canvas Shoes

If you have a pair of white canvas typed shoes that you are looking to spruce up, then check out this awesome video tutorial that I created. I think that you will really love how simple it is to make a design with sharpies and nail polish.









Check out some of my other DIY projects at my other blog Love Hope Adventure. 

Mending Friendships

Have you ever had a friendship that just sort of fell away? Maybe there wasn't a real parting, but you drifted apart in some way or another. I know that for me, that has happened many times. One day, you just realize that you are not longer spending time with someone that you once hung out with a lot.

A few months back, I had a friend see me at the grocery store, and it was a surreal moment as she came up to me and said, "I'm so sorry we haven't hung out lately. I just feel like I would bring you down with everything going on in my life." Talk about a wake up call. I didn't even know that she was intentionally avoiding me. I guess I just thought that we had grown apart for a time. When life gets busy, you can easily forget about friends.

When you get woken out of your slumber with a hard slap, like I did that day, these are the things that run through your mind:



Why have I been such a terrible friend?

Things need to change. 

How can I make this right? 



Follow the link below to read my thoughts from that day in the grocery store, where my world came to a complete halt. These are my first hand thoughts the minute I got home from the store.

The Day Snow Was on Its Way



What Now?



After you realize that you have a relationship that has fallen by the wayside, here are some things you can do to get back on track:

1. Be intentional- the chances are, if you are not longer spending time with someone, there has been a change in your life. You must be intentional to spend time with them. Make it a point to invite them over, send them a text, or call them on the phone.

2. Get over your pride- maybe you have had a bit of a falling out, or some reason you are no longer spending time with that person. Clearly, my friend was having some guilt issues associated with being in my presence. You have to put aside whatever reason you have avoided someone.

3. Make a commitment- it really all boils down to being committed. You must decide you are willing to do what it takes to spend time with this person again. If you drifted away once, it can easily happen again. Make it up in your mind that you will be committed to spending time with this person.





It takes time and commitment to have a relationship of any kind. We are so in need of relationships in our lives. It is the reason for living. Take the time you need to build strong ties with other people.

The Reasons to Kiss Your Spouse Goodbye

Do you kiss your spouse every time you walk out of the door or at night before going to bed? If not, you are really missing out the amazing things it can do for your relationship. It is very important that you spend time showing your spouse non-sexual physical attention. Not only is it comforting, but it does help later on when you want to be intimate.

Here are a few reasons why I think that kissing your spouse goodbye is really important.

1. You remember to kiss them every day- Have you ever gotten to the end of the day and realized you haven't kiss your lover? It can be so easy to get caught up in what is going on that you forget to do this simple thing with the one you love.

2. It reminds you that you love them- Whenever you kiss someone, including parents and children, you are reminded of your love for them.

3. It shows them you love them- Many times, actions speak louder than words. Show your spouse how much you love them by this simple act.



These are just a few reasons why you should kiss your spouse goodbye or goodnight each day. Check out this article for more reasons that kissing each day is important to your marriage relationship.



5 Reasons Why You Should Kiss Your Spouse Goodbye

Ways to Cheer Up a Loved One on a Bad Day

Whenever my husband or friends are having a bad day, I try to do something nice for them to cheer them up. I think we all try to come up with ways to encourage the people we love. For me, I am the kind of person that really enjoys creating fun gifts that will bring a smile to someone's face.

I have seen and idea online that you can't put a bad day box together for those that you love. This is something you can put together ahead of time, or you can make it up spur of the moment. I personally suggest that you at least keep on hand some things you would put in boxes for encouragement. In my closet, I have a designated area where I keep candy, candles, lotions, inexpensive instrumental cd's, and anything that I think would be good for encouraging people. Since I keep these things on hand, I'm able to put together a basket or box very quickly.



If you are looking for ways to encourage someone who is going through a rough time, here are some things you can consider putting in their bad day box:

Candy- Unless you know that they are on a diet or can't have sugar, then candy is always one of my first choices. There are a wealth of cute phrases you can attach to pieces of candy. For example, if you have a pack of Stride gum, you could attach the phrase, "Slow down and take it all in Stride". If you get a pack of Extra gum, then you can attach a phrase, "You are Extra special". See where I'm going with this? Be creative using the candy you have on hand.

Music- Songs can soothe the soul. Even if you don't know what kind of music someone enjoys, instrumental is always a good idea. Music is so readily available to us now. You don't have to have a CD to send someone music. Consider creating a youtube playlist and sharing it with them. Or you can post a song on someone's facebook wall, or email them the link. If you want to include music in a box, just put a note in the box telling them to check their email, or facebook wall where you have shared the music.

Snacks- I'm all about the snack! I don't know about anyone else, but I normally don't purchase special snacks for myself. Often, I don't get things like that unless someone else purchases them for me. I'm not suggesting that you fill someone up with food for comfort, but snacks are a practical gift that is sure to be used.

Pictures- Looking at pictures of old times or people that you love is a sure fire way to boost your spirits. Including a picture of you and the person together is a great way to encourage them. You could frame a small photograph, or make up a short scrapbook. One time, I just taped a picture inside the lid of the box.

Hobbies- Consider what their hobbies are. If they are a crafter, then adding in a few craft supplies is a great way to cheer them. If they love watching movies, consider putting a DVD in the box. Maybe they love to read, so you can include an Amazon gift card or a book you know they would enjoy.



These are just a few things you can do to encourage someone that is having a bad day.



Check out this link below to get some other ideas of what to do for a bad day box or ways to cheer up a loved one.

Bad Day Box For Your Loved One

At Home Dates Can Be Special

I have had the privilege of being married to my high school sweetheart for the last 11 years. All of my life growing up, my mom instilled in me that you should always date your spouse. Considering she and my dad have been married for more than 40 years, I figure she knows what she is talking about.



If you are married and have any children living at home that need to be cared for, you know how hard it can be to do a date night. For me, finding sitters that are available can be a real problem. Even when I can find a sitter, by the time I pay them, and then we go out to do anything, our date budget is spent for the next few months. For this reason, planning a date night at home has saved my husband, Austin, and I a lot of money. We are able to connect with each other and enjoy one another's company.

In order to put together an at home date night, there are some things you really need to do for it to be successful. Here are a few tips to make your time together meaningful:

Have a Plan- It is very important to have a plan when creating time together. If you were going out somewhere, you would likely have some kind of plan. Even if you didn't have specifics set up, you would know you were going to go out to eat, watch a movie, go shopping, hiking...just whatever you enjoy doing.

Make it Special- One of the biggest hurdles we have with at home date nights is that we are in a familiar place. It is our home, an environment where we hang out and relax. For a night at home to be successful, you should do something out of the ordinary. If you normally sit around and watch television with each other, consider doing something else. Maybe a board game is in order, or drinking a cup of coffee on the back porch, maybe building a fire in the fireplace. Whatever you decide, make it out of the usual.

Get Dressed for The Night- Many people love coming home so that they can get comfortable. When you have a special night planned at home, it is equally as important to be dressed for the time together. Whatever you would normally where on a date, you can wear that. Don't be afraid to even get dressed up a little. Again, the key here is that you do something out of the normal with each other.



For a few more ideas of things to do on an at home date night, check out this link for a brilliant idea involving cuddling:

A Date Night at Home